“Forget to Think”

A friend recently told me I needed to stop over thinking everything.  In Blink by Malcolm Gladwell, he reasoned that the more time you kept thinking about something; the less intuitive your conclusions would be. Romeo says it best when Benvolio told him to stop thinking so much about Rosaline, “O, teach me how I should forget to think.”

Seriously, how do you forget to think?  When I posed to him that question and he exasperatedly responded with “You’re over thinking it again.” The irony only struck me then.  I didn’t pursue the subject.

Usually people call me perceptive.  So I appreciated it when someone gave me a different outlook on how I think.  And I do agree with him.  I mean it sometimes drives me crazy how much I analyze situations especially when I’m trying to relax.  I also often incorrectly judge a situation, which generally makes matters worse.

When I read the line about forgetting to think from Romeo & Juliet, I was excited because I thought Benvolio might have some advice for Romeo and, in this case, me. Benvolio tells him to go look at other women.  I think that is sound advice since the instance Romeo saw Juliet; he was in love and forgot about Rosaline.  But what if Rosaline was the one? What if he hadn’t met Juliet?  Maybe looking at other women would have driven him to put Rosaline on an even higher pedestal and find her that much better and more pure than any other dame.

In the end, I do believe Benvolio said the correct thing in the situation (though that situation doesn’t really apply to me) and that exploring other options helps you not dwindle on something unhappy for too long.  But I also believe committing to something and “putting all your eggs in one basket” is the only way you can truly be happy.

I’m not going to change and even if I wanted to, I don’t think I could.  I noticed that while I analyze everyone’s (including me) actions, I rarely plan for the future.  I make split second decisions and try to commit. Commitment, that’s my New Year’s resolution.  I will stop complaining and always commit to a situation I’m in and try to find the beauty and happiness that often reside.

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